slacker mail....

yup, i certainly am slackin this week...trek i'm surprised ya haven't called me on it yet,lol.....no really i sorry guys, during mail time yesterday i took a 2 hour catnap,lol..its not my fault someone keeps me up all hours of da night...

okies i'm ready for some serious carpel tunnel cuz this is gonna be effin long..be prepared!!!...i even have a checklist, cuz i knew i'd forget stuff,lol...

christmas was a big sucess, i know i sent my special edition, but i'll just elaborate a lil more,lol..ok i gotta say i haven't seen alex or chris' faces for more than 5 minutes at a time, they're glued to their damn gameboys..we've changed the batteries bout 10 times by now i think..i wasn't gonna tell dis story i left it outta da special ed. but since someone i know enjoyed it i figured oh hell why not,lol...christmas night alex's gameboy was in dire need of new batteries already so da movie star went fishin fer batteries n came up 1 short...so i'm like ok, brb....i go downstairs to "da drawer" n fill up my lil front shirt pocket...come upstairs n say here, dunno if these will help....da movie star just so happened to get a battery tester for his birthday so he went out to da garage n bout 10 minutes later comes back in n says..."well outta 37 batteries, 19 show possible signs of life"......figured you'd like dat...shup MA...i haven't even started on you yet!!!, lmao

friday night, when motherlesbianinlaw was here cakie started whinin n mumblin something bout a fuzzy...we're all lookin at her like she's crazy, she sayin her fuzzy hurt, so we go lookin round fer some distressed stuffed animal, i mean we're casin room to room,lol...we give up, n we're gettin em ready fer bed, i go n change her diaper n she says it again...i'm like what the hells yer fuzzy?...she points, omg i rolled.......so i'm thinkin now i'mma gonna call mine my fuzzy too, LMAO...the girl kills me tho...i call her my lil chunk a butt...she fires right back..i'm not a shunk a butt i a hot mama...
what kind of monster have i created?...

yes the kids have stayed healthy for a whole week......no one is snifflin, coughin, or anything grosser,lol...school starts back monday n although i'd like to put em out w/ next weeks garbage right now i know they'll become lil carrier monkeys all over again startin monday...pray fer me,lol...

woohooo its new years eve, can someone tell me what happened to 2003?...holy crow it flew by...i dunno what yall have for exciting new years plans but i'm jus kicken back at home, not havin company, not cookin jus orderin pizza n wings n havin lil snacks later..tomorrow well i hadda do it..i invited motherlesbianinlaw n "casey" ova fer dinner..its all chris' fault i tell ya...i took out this spiral ham n i was supposed to have made it sunday, well chris got it in his mind that no mom wasn't cookin that we wuz goin to the chinese buffet...he won...we did go, no sorry folks i did not step in anymore jello...i swear timmy is in awe of da chinese chicks who wait til the plates are pushed aside then come n get em...he cleared one plate, n he's holdin it...well doesn't one chick walk by..timmy was waitin, n when she didn't come straight over to take the plate he yells...hey lady!!!...omg i buried muh head in muh lo mein, lmao...then he's holdin da plate n waitin fer her to come back, i'm like timmy just put it on the table...no...alrighty then, finally she comes over to clear a plate that was on da table n timmy puts his plate in her face...lol...she took it n he was happy.....

saturday was moms holiday party, always an interesting time....when asked where mango was the response was oh he's not feeling well n didn't want to come and chance getting anyone sick......yeah right, he's a dickhead criminal n in jail would have been better but hey,lol..lisas hangin in there...what else can she do right?......so at this here gathering ya have, mom, dad, n lisa...me n my clan...my aunt, my cousin dana (who i shouldn't say this but is mentally challenged n prolly more normal than most in muh family..), n my cousin todd who brought his new gf who is preggers n her lil 3 year old son...(todd is a former alternative freaky kind who i see but maybe 2 times a year)...the lil boy was bouncin off da walls worse than any of mine but timmy got along w/ him pretty well...pretty soon there were kids all over runnin n screamin n loud toys, n dad crankin up da OTB channel ...lol...us women, (n todd who i swear thought swung da other way there fer a bit..LOL)..were all sittin round da kitchen table..we got to talkin bout lisa lookin fer an apartment n i chimed in, thats cuz mom n dad wanna turn yer bedroom into a sex dungeon..my cousin todd neva heard me talk that way n almost fell outta his chair...lol...my aunt comes back w/...well just cuz you have a sex dungeon in yer basement why shouldn't she have one?...omg my bedroom is in muh basement, dats it folks ..LOL...n lemme tell ya bout muh aunt, she is the holiest of rollers ya ever met...she goes to church every single day i swear, n goes away on all kinds of religious retreats..so of course i'm makin fun of her.....askin her iffen its really a cult or iffen she's really doin porn movies n just sayin its religious...we were all dyin, she's just like, ya really think yer funny?..i'm like yup ...then my cousin todds sayin how she asked him to drive her to church christmas day, so he gets into da car n starts headin towards church, she says no not that church i went there yesterday, lmao...i said to todd, dammit boy you shoulda looked for the light...he fires back..."i swear i was folowin the light but the damn light was takin me to the wrong church, how was i supposed to know?"...lmao..n he was dissin her cuz she always makes da sign of the cross when ever she passes a church, cemetary (or as he says "anywhere a church used to be, doen't matter it could be a wendys n she still does it)...he goes on to say, geez mom its like gods at the helm of the wheel...LMAO..i swear i needed depends that day!!!...n of course mom feels the need to start talkin sex...lisa n i just cringe..she's talkin bout quickies n shit n sayin how as they get older the knees n back don't hold out as long..OMG i swear thats where my intestinal bug came from...from that moment on i was in perpetual puke mode, lol...sry folks but mom is a large woman, i'm talkin i used to ask her iffen we could rent her ass out to use it as a screen for a drive-in movie in da backyard, LMAO...(always da entraprenuer (er however da eff ya spell it)...n i used to see moms "nighties" just layin round..ok so i thought they were curtains......bottom line guys, its just a nasty thought to have on my mom on her knees......yes I WENT THERE...

hey MA BERT...how ya doin ova there?......i'm still getti ya dat ass waxin' you just wait n see...

ok coopy blunder of da week...i was tryin to pry apart frozen hamburgers da other night, n da damn point of muh knife broke off into da hamburgers n i stabbed muhself in da gut w/ da knife...guess it twas a good thing the point wasn't there,lol...i finally get em apart n there was da point, LMAO...i'm a danger to muhself n society i know

ahh once new years is over, i get a whole 2 weeks til the next shindig...timmys birthday part on da 11th ...but hey after timmys birthday party, no more parties til may ..

dontcha think i rambled on for way too long?...well i'd love to keep ramblin, i could ramble for days...i could ramble bout strings, n swimmin in da dead sea but..some things need to be kept secret huh?..LMAO...anywho i'm gonna go lite one of them there duraflame logs cuz i can't lite any kinda firewood fer shit...lol, i have the phonebook to prove it, took out all da K's n still couldn't start da damn fire...shup you,LOL...n i gotta check da chocolate chip pie i'm makin fer da dinner tomorrow...PLEASE STAY SAFE TONIGHT!!!!!...don't no one go gettin silly...ok well get silly but just be safe...i care bout all ya very much..here's to a great new year w/ lotsa smiles n laffs ...n fer da love of pete...iffen you can start da new year off w/ a bang..do it!!!! ...no i'm not talkin firearms....i don't wanna hear.."well i did it cuz coopy told me to..." sorry charlie i'll turn on ya, LMAO.....talk to yall later..

coopy

yer special ed....

ok by special ed., i swear i meant edition n not callin ya mentally challenged...er' wuz i?.....hell da jury is still out on most of ya......or is it me?.....lol

well what a freakin day!!!...lol...ok but b4 i go on bout t-day..lemme talk bout yesterday...

okies, so i get off..(ok you pervs...i meant get off of the computer..)...hang out w/ da lil family, get alot of snacks together, whipped up one of them there no bake cheesecakes for the next day, n loaded da grinch movie for the kiddies..since it was gonna be a quiet night i decided to go w/ snacks n movies...we ran outta diapers (not a good thing when 1 child is on antibiotics )...n da freakin store was closed...grrrr, but motherlesbianinlaw w/ "girlfriend" casey stopped off a convienience type store on da way ova, got size 4 diapers, lmao lil small but i wasn't bout to complain,lol...they get ova to da house we get some more snacks together n ordered chinese food...HEY!!...i wasn't cookin,lmao...we gotta 2004 wall scroll calendar ...after that we watched national lampoons christmas vacation...( "where's eddie?..he usually eats these damn things".."no eddie doesn't eat them anymore since he read squirrels are high in cholesterol"..."thanks catherine")...after that movie how could one not put on the 24 hours of a christmas story??? ( the heavenly aroma still hung heavy in the air)...then alex began to worry that santa wouldn't come cuz they were still up, chris was determined to stay up n see santa i tryed tellin him if he stayed up santa would know n not show up, thus sendin alex into a frenzy tellin chris not to ruin christmas, lmao... casey said to motherlesbianinlaw "ya ready to go cher?"...i spit diet coke all ova muhself..um does that make casey sonny?....(fyi...motherlesbianlaws name is rose,lol...)...after the goodbyes, i told her to be here by 7 a.m..n then they were off...we did the pee's n teeth, got santas cookies n milk ready then tucked em all in bed n put on the ole "yule log" channel for em to go to sleep to...i wasn't feelin too good so i left da movie star to do da dirty work n i took muh lil happy ass to bed...i planned on dat goose'in but feelin bad sidelined dat,lol...i fell asleep watch'in da yule log too but got up around 1 n slithered upstairs, good thing too...dirty work was done, but da damn turkey was still in da sink thawin n da movie star was asleep on da couch...i put it in da fridge, hit him on da head n told him to go to bed..

next thing i know outta sheer instict i kinda jolted up..i look ova, da movie star was wide awake starin at me..i'm like uh..what time is it?..he says 7:30...i said uh i told yer mom 7...in those 2 minutes timmy starts screamin he has pee pee ..(this means..you damn woman get yer ass up here n change me)...i go up look out da window, motherlesbianinlaw is asleep in her car in our driveway, LMAO...gary goes n gets her..(she was frozen, didn't wanna run da car for fear she'd wake her angels..)...i go in to change timmy, alex darts up, yells to chris to get up n in warp speed i see 2 bodies go flying from their beds n around da corner...i tell timmy santa came but he cryed..didn't want nuttin to do wiff it at dat point..n cakie was spread eagle on her back catchin flys, no gettin dat girl up,lol..i go in the living room, alex n chris were already goin to town..timmy finally came in n i helped him w/ his presents, most of which were vehicles w/ different size wheels, the boy was thrilled to say the least...miss midol finally joined us n jumped right in..she got lots of dollies n lotsa dress up stuff, omg you'd die a bratz suitcase full of all kinds of dress up stuff, i'm in heaven,lol...i sliced muh finger right open on a pair of scissors tryin to open up a my little baby (micropet baby..worst gift so far, she doesn't stop cryin n googlin )...i was treated right away tho, motherlesbianinlaw stocked all da kids w/ a box of band-aids..chris gave me a blues clues one w/ joe on it,lol..after bout 3 hours n a destroyed house..i put a christmas story back on,lol...timmy was in his glory, it just kept going n going......we set off to start dinner, motherlesbianinlaw left n we began clean-up for the next batch of company..my family (inset creepy music here...either that or the music played whenever the bumpas hounds were on a christmas story,lol)..we bs'ed, ate snacks, opened more gifts, uhhuh more loud toys...n readied ourselves for dinner...chris conked out on da recliner, but we ate dinner...woohooo dat freakin turkey oh my lord...no sorry folks no sex...still wasn't feelin quite right...i'm horny as hell now tho..., too bad tho da movie star is puttin a computer chair together for my mother..n besides i'm writin this novel...lol...

yes you've waited for the next family dinner,lol...this one too had its share of um..out of context dialog...such as...when talkin bout all da sickness surroundin us this past cpl weeks...my mother exclaiming to my dad how she's never really known my grandmother to get diarehhea ..n when lisa said she was goin to get a cpl friends, mom said well don't plan on stayin cuz her n dad were gonna be downstairs ..i'm like hang on what day is it?..thursday, hmm isn't date night on saturday?..lmao...i said oh dear twice in one week..my moms eyes lit up n said oh yes its christmas...best presents are the ones ya don't buy..i'm dyin, dads like..well i say don't put off til tomorrow what ya can do today..i swear i almost pissed muhself..i said to gary who was in the kitchen..you hearin this?..he yells back...i'm trying not too......n lisa said something about big meatballs givin her heartburn..my mom fires back, well its the big balls givin ya troubles now but the small ones are the ones ya played with n got in trouble to begin with..my god i'm related to these people......oh n keep in mind my dad (who had to sit next to his lil princess katie)..is arguin n eggin her on all through dinner, tellin her to stuff it n buzz off,lol...i swear its not me givin her the attitude..although i was called on giving her a super huge mego-ego..what?..just cuz i ask her about 50 times a day..hey cakie?..what mommy?..who's pretty?..meeeeeee....lmao....i'm guilty as hell but i'd rather her have self esteem than none,lol...oh i'm gonna pay royally for this in 10 years i'm thinkin...lol...

after dessert, lisa ran for the door...prolly gotta get back in time for a 2 minute pay phone collect call from the fruit in jail ..ok i'll be nice...jackass...lol..mom n dad soon followed, don't worry tho, moms holiday party w/ more whacks from my side of da family is saturday (ya haven't met muh religious not all right in da head aunt lizzie-tish yet....she makes mom look good...skeery huh?...lol)..

thats really bout it, we put the kids to bed, timmy n cakie watchin their new tv santa brought em..n alex n chris glued to their gameboys in bed...da movie star n i will prolly watch jeepers creepers 2 ..then i'll prolly wander back here for a bit..i'm purty tired tho..i reorganized all da shit under the tree bout 5 times so far..n i know by the time i step foot in the living room tomorrow mornin i'll have to do it again..i hope everyone had a great day..loved yer email opal, even tho muh eyes were fixated on da right side on everything for the next half hour,lol...i'm thinkin everyone should post their day..i know we aren't the only brave souls ...new years is up next..i wanna wish everyone the best of health n happiness n i hope we can all share alotta smiles n laffs together..i luvs yall...

coopy

ok guys early coopy mail...i'm bored...

ok i'm dyin here...dave ya killin me..my kids are just lookin at me like i'm nutz i'm laffin so hard...lmao..well he does need special attention ..teeth er' not ..n hell ya won but uh...i was wearin dat cotton candy ya done ran off w/ in victory...

ok folks, other than this status crack up...i'm bored outta muh freakin skull...you're all either bravin the last minute christmas rush, makin cookies, wrappin..or hey dare i not forget...in da damn trees....lol...hellifiknow where yall are but fuck i'm all alone ...

so instead of talkin to muhself..i'll put self aside n start ramblin..

well hell lets see, i told ya my week would get worse didn't i?..well since then...timmys medicine quit on him a day into it, i had to call the damn doctor who thankfully trusted me enough not to wanna see him n just switched his antibiotic..hmm what else, oh yes..i hadda get chris an hour into his school day friday on account of his ear hurtin..he goes to da docs, yuppers ear infection...and...confirmed strep...holy cripes i can't win...da movie star is on an antibiotic now for an ear infection too...they're all back to bouncin off da walls n annoyin da shit outta me well cept for hubby but he's just a big baby,lol...

got hit w/ some huge news on thursday..apparently my sisters fruit didn't learn his lesson da first time n got arrested for stealin..he'll be in jail for christmas n half of next month ...what can i say?..i lost faith, i feel shitty for her n i can't do a darn thing to help but to listen...grrr fuckin grrr...of course she thinks he'll change but we all know how dat goes...anywho...i'll be extra clowny on christmas day to try cheerin her up....

i actually think i'm havin a quiet christmas...well christmas eve at least...motherlesbianinlaw informed me that all da other people we invited ova for christmas eve weren't gonna be able to make it..nice of em to tell me huh?....but that she'd still be coming..prolly bringin casey too i'd asume..so dats good it'll just be us..christmas day after about oh 6 excedrin migraine,lol...(watch out i just may force muhself to take dat creepy medicine) my parents n lisa will come ova for turkey dinner ..uhhuh at muh house.....w/ da kids preoccupied w/ all dat stuff dat fat jolly man brought em..who knows what might happen ...motherlesbianinlaw will prolly come ova too..again..lol..oh hell i spose dats da holidays fer ya huh?...lol...christmas day is usually a riot cuz alex n chris get to go "shoppin" at da dollar store w/ a list n money...they buy for us, grands, n godparents...then that day they give em...omg you'd die at some of the things they pick out..i think they got my sister white eyeshadow one year, n my dad a pair of socks...lmao..i'm always kept in da dark cuz i like to peek,lol...so i'm clueless as to whats goin down again this year,lol..

i am really excited about christmas, really i am,lol...kids have most everything they've asked for, cakies gonna be a blast this year..we went to da mall thursday night n she sat on his lap, told him she wanted a doll n gave him a hug...timmy coulda cared less,lol...he was like yeah whatever just gimme good stuff i've been sick i deserve it ya fat bastard,lol...i'm good at readin muh kids,lol...bad thing is...we haven't wrapped anything for em yet..thinkin it'll happen tonight er' tomorrow night..w/ tomorrow night bein cookie night too ..i wrapped hubbys today..wasn't too much just alotta clothes..i figure i'm good at clothes cuz he certainly won't buy em he'll just wear the old shit w/ fourty nine thousand rips n holes in em....he's good for a christmas goose too ..

ok bigtime ventin here...i'm home w/ all 4 til january 5th ..i will definitely need one of two things...either a vacation...or a purty white jacket that ties in da back occupanied by a padded cell..i'm honestly tryin to get him to take me somewhere for our anniversary in february but it's not lookin good,lol..i'll keep tryin, maybe he'll just send me w/out him by the time i get through...hey that could work too,lol...

i'm diggin here into da brain...tryin to think of anything new goin on or anything hilarious...the kids were pretty much down fer da count last week so nothing really funny came from them..ohhhhh i um had an encounter w/ a fire extinguisher on thursday...but i'm not givin details,lol...all i'll say is i um almost burnt muh house up but luckily tragedy was adverted..lmao, ok yes theres so much more to dat story but um i ain't tellin,lol...hey i still had muh eggs dat day,lol...

kk imma cuttin dis one short, gonna go lay down wiff bonnie n clyde n have muhself a lil nap so that i'm well rested for another long night...i hope yall have the best christmas ever...wishing you lots of excedrin n smiles...eat alotta turkey, think of me n what i'm prolly doin,lol...just laugh wheneva ya read some assembly required...n last but not least..BE SURE TO DRINK YOUR OVALTINE!!!!!...yes peeps 24 hours,lol...tune in...n talk to ya before n after...count on dat!!...

coopy

jus another week in muh life...

hidey ho ladies n gents...well it's been one hell of a hellatious week so far w/ another one to come so lemme get ta ramblin...

well da evil freakin germ hit da house like a ton of bricks right after i had dat house full of snot nosed ankle biters sunday...chris was spikin a fever left n right spent 2 days at home...to rebound 1 day then be sick da next...torture i tell ya...cakie was down fer da count right along w/ chris...killed me, no midol moments, no lil 2 year old lip, she jus layed on da couch...oh don't you worry tho, she is perfect yet again givin me da baby pms and havin moments left n right..jus w/ a lil remainin cough and a 2 year old demi moore voice......alex remained unscathed throughout da whole thing...and muh dear sweet angel boy timmy...god it hit him hard bout 4 days into it...got really bad saturday and by monday 3 a.m. he was (yes here we go again) cryin that his ear hurt..by the time he could see a doctor it was a double ear infection......he's on da mend finally, has antibiotics and will be racin his red truck all along the damn hardwood floors annoyin da shit outta me in the nearest of future......

kk on da baby fruit front...lisa had her ultrasound friday...only 1 baby thank you dear sweet jesus..we wuz worried there were more than 1, ok ok i wuz worried the most cuz you know who is the one taking care of the baby while she goes and finishes her schoolin in da fall......ya'll knew i need another baby right?...lol...what's another 1?...lol...it's k, just seals my place in da psych ward a lil more..she seems to think she "saw something" on da ultrasound leadin her to believe it's a boy...i personally think she's fulla shit but we will see...i want a girl ...

friday night we got most of our christmas shoppin done...got our layaways off at wal-mart after an hour and a half wait in line ...then paid for our purchases after bout another half hour wait at da checkouts..isn't it just da most wonderful time of year???...hell no i say...the first day of school will always be my personal fave...omg those lil shits have 2 whole weeks off this year...HELP ME PLEASE!!!!...this friday i'll tie up da lose ends shoppin and go out w/ lisa...one can only imagine what we'll run into this year....last year we encountered a man hangin outta his drawers in da mens underwear section (thank god it wasn't womens) of wal-mart...i was speechless peeps...coopy couldn't say nuffin...and lisa was jus laffin and snortin herself into an asthma attack, lmao...

tomorrow night is da christmas concert at school...we'll go walk bout an hour to get to da school, to find standin room only and way ova max capacity, kids will cry, scream, oh yeah sing....then its over, another hour to da car then home...oh joy....lol....grrrrrr

and oh yes this weekend we were hit by another storm..after last weekends 30 inches hey sundays 7 inches was a mere squall in comparison..but a pain in muh damn ass none the less...grrrrrr

man i gotta share this...my mom is seriously losin her mind...not really news she's been this way since god ...well...all muh life..see the woman can never say a phrase the way it's intended...case in point number 1..she was talkin to da movie star on da phone one mornin not too far back here sayin how the weather was affecting her hand...for she has "tenderitis".......uhhuh she meant tendonitis but being afflicted w/ her impairment it came out all wrong...course da movie star near pissed himself w/ laffter but hey,lol...and seein my dad next it made the list of hot topics...dad calls mom on everything her impairment causes her to say....he's a freakin riot, he don't say much but holy god look out when he does...lol...ok impairment case and point #2...(this made my dad roll over in laughter)...mom and dad were talkin bout D-Day..mom says "well yes people will always remember it but nothing like the 9th of september..."...my dad knowing all too well where this was going says..."oh yeah sue...what happened on that day?"...my mom answers.."are you kidding me?..9/11 you asshole..." LMFAO......i'm so not laffin bout what happened ya know dat, jus laffin at my moms stupidity.....lmao, that ones a treasure we'll be talkin bout for some time to come...ranks high w/ da egg salad food poisoning at easter back when i was 7......

so how we all doin folks?..all set 4 da holiday?...i'll say i am til i get a housefull of more people bringin in more evil germs...jus seems i can neva win...i will say timmy being so sick caused me to take da day from spawn class ...woofreakinhoo...

yesterday was a snow day, kids all home buggin da shit outta me...chris was climbin da baby gate and fell his loose front tooth got knocked out.......after he calmed himself we found it, he got excited..we let him fall asleep w/ it then with all the concern over timmy we forgot about it...remembered at 3 a.m when we were up w/ timmy and by then timmy had woken up da whole house, after chris stayed up to spite us he finally started snorin and we knew it was safe...he got a 2 dollar bill cuz neither da movie star nor i had any singles, lmao and this mornin the comentary between alex and chris was bout how da tooth fairy comes and gives money after such a presdious (yeah u knew what i meant...furk spell check!!) honor such as losin a tooth...alex being the comedian says.."how come there isn't a potty fairy...i learned that and i've been doing it all these years for nothing"......goofball...i offered to put him in pull-ups and he changed his tune...LMAO...

well dats bout all i think i can ramble bout fer now....i'm gettin tired, i need to get a second wind here so i can find dat damn tree...i'mma gonna go get a diet coke and a cpl cepacol losenges for this evil germ...nice combo huh?...lol...hey bratty one?...did ya break in da pocket pussy yet?..lmao...oh and i highly recommend dawns harmony.com for da body lotions peeps, i got mine saturday and their creamy coconut although a lil thicker is great, and da cotton candy body lotion ...well heavenly...let's just say i smell so good i'd eat muhself iffin i could......purple sweetie?...take dat status off....i miss ya all da time gf...reeses me misses u 2 gf but we manage to keep in touch...i'll be bouncin still tho....ok muh lil spuds i need to get scootin get a few things done in case i'm up w/ timmy again tonight...poor lil guy..he breaks muh heart he just looks at me and says...mommy you lay w/ me?...mush i tell ya...i'm tellin ya tho that mush will turn to a migraine here in da next day i'll bet, hearin dat red truck on da floors...we aren't talkin no smooth slow paces, i'm talkin at least 30mph...skids n all... god help me...

twistedly insanely yours...
coopy

call me a slacker now....nanana poo poo

ahhh yes, tis i, tis yer weekly edition of my insanity...i figured i have the free time now, and a quiet house finally (more to come on dat....) and well i have no company in my bush..LMAO...ok so bush just doesn't sound right but i ain't sayin my tree...no branches here i tell ya...ok ok what do i call it?.....ahhh yes how bout muh love shack , yeah there we go...ok right now muh shack is vacant,lol...

ok i'm just destressin over one hell of a week...bare with me iffin i get too silly...lol

so...lemme tell ya bout thursday...kk it was hubbys birthday iffin ya keepin track...well i marinated steaks overnight in his honor (my kids don't like it..sidenote...it'll all come together i swear) and while the bigger boys were at school timmy, cakie and muhself made a cake and frosted it and decorated it...then when the boys came home the 4 kids got out crayons and paper and made him birthday cards...kk and since da christmas party for his work was friday night we had to go do our grocery shoppin, we had motherlesbianinlaw all lined up...til she called soundin like death sayin she couldn't make it she was sick...panic hit, i called lisa...nuttin, no one could come, so knowin that, i got the kids all ready for school friday and homework done then dinner, figuring we'd all pile in the van and go shoppin...well the movie star strolls in an hour late (myself and the kids had already eaten) he's tryin too hard to talk so i knew he went out drinkin.. ohhhhh i was fuckin livid...i bitched..he ate dinner, avoided the kids who wanted to hang on him, we had no cake..all he wanted to do was sleep on the couch......oh i wasn't pretty, i wanted nothing more than to throw the fuckin cake at him...not to mention now shopping was off and i had to deal with the kids who wanted to go out...of course 1 simple little phone call to me would've been more than sufficient, i coulda said ok no prob have a drink but don't get crazy cuz we gotta go out..apparently i'm not worth that decency...its ok tho, my bunny will profit greatly from his mistake...as for him, not my problem ...

friday, well as far as i had known, the christmas party was off on account of his sorry ass'ishness from the previous nights fiasco, we needed stuff for the 2 parties so we were going shoppin...yup again coopy is stuck at home, no party for me...yeah i was lookin forward to it, to a certain degree but on the other hand it was a relief that i was spared a night w/ the whole clan of grease monkeys.....when alex and chris got home from school we had cake for snack, uhhuh we sure did.....then about a half hour from his quittin time, his boss calls me and tells me he's been trying to get us a sitter all day and he couldn't but i had to find a way to get gary to the party on account of him getting an award..oh great i'm pissed off at the fuck and now i'm supposed to put a smile on and say go, have fun???...fuckkkkkkkkkk dat....i told him he prolly wouldn't go cuz we were fightin...well more like me ignorin and him ignorin...but he kept callin and beggin..i called motherlesbianinlaw and she said once again she couldn't come because of her "virus"......so now i'm supposed to squeeze in shoppin then have him ready for 7?...again fuckkkkkkkkk dat...timmy had just fallen asleep when gary got in so i wasn't about to wake him up...i told gary he had to go and he argued it wasn't fair to me...to which i responded no nothings ever fair to me but i've learned to deal...truth hurts..oh well, he decided to take the older boys to the store....a few calls from the boss again then hubby again and when they got home he had basically been bullied into going and within 15 minutes he was gone...yeah i was still pissed but i really like when he isn't home too,lol...of course he pissed me off a whole lot more when he fell in about 1:30 in the mornin drunk off his ass..gary doesn't know when to stop and it pisses me off, he doesn't get drunk but maybe a half dozen times of year but still, lol...its my job to bitch!!!...i swear within him being home 5 minutes he got down to bed and for the next 15 minutes i heard bowl worshippin...yeah that pissed me off more and i got muh shit from downstairs and took up on da couch..

friday also brought...Brown Bear...chris gets off the bus w/ this bag and i swear as soon as i saw it i cringed...ok what it is is chris was picked as star of the week, this entitles him to bring Brown Bear home and this damn bear lemme tell ya, although yes cute and cuddly...is a pain in the god darned ass!!!...see whatcha gotta do is, the damn bear comes w/ a journal..you need to chronicle brown bears entire day by day stay w/ your child..of course kindergarten kids can't write so who does it???...uhhuh...SUCKER....ok and not only did friday bring the added pain in the ass brown bear, but..it brought one hell of a last minute weather forecast..ok i swear in less than 24 hours we went from ok folks this is gonna be like 1-3 inches (no sweat for us damn upstaters)...to...ok folks it's gonna be a helluva storm...18-20 inches...great i'm thinkin there go the parties...and the dips waiting in the fridge i had spent da night makin..

saturday mornin, 1 look out the window and we knew we had to call off the family party...chris was so sad but it couldn't be helped, there was a foot out there already and it was a white out...2 of hubbys good friends defy'd mother nature tho just to cheer chris up and bring him his present...that was sweet....we let chris play playstation games most of the day and i decided i wasn't cookin so we ordered chinese (blizzard or not the chinese are always open) and gary and a friend went to the store for the cake we were supposed to have had for the family party...figured i'd use it for the kids party since even during the storm saturday i still had parents rsvp'in......(sidenote!!!...woohooooo the cake meant i didn't have to make cupcakes!!)...

sunday mornin brought more snow but coming to a stop they said, parents callin sayin they're still comin, us decoratin and shovelin out...i made mass amounts of hot chocolate for the kids and we were ready...i think we had a total of 10 classmates then my 4..not bad they were all well behaved, yes about 8 parents stayed....3 dads (including the hot gym teacher omg his ass, i think my eyes were glued there,lol) and 4 moms..(yeah a cpl i'd even do,lol)...they had a blast painting and glittering their christmas magnets...omg the mess was so minimal i was shocked and pleased..cleanup was quick, we were praised as being very efficient and soon they were off...ah yes i should mention here..we had a total accumulation of 30 inches by afternoon when it was all said and done with..(I HATE THIS SHIT!!!! )...as the kids left...mom, dad, gram, lisa, and mango came in...they were coming for chris and they were buyin dinner too,lol...we ordered, sat around and bs'd while cakie yelled at everyone and timmy threw about 4 shit fits jus cuz he was exhausted,lol..da fruit went to get the food and when he came back we all sat down to eat......yes it was yer typical coopy family dinner, can't get away from the smut...we talked about how mom uses her breasts as a cup holder and dad and mom out shovelin the previous night, only for him to send mom in early on account of her not strainin the needed parts for "date night"......gary havin a weak stomach and a lil more than tmi factored him leavin da room,lol...they always eat and run so pretty soon after dinner they all took off and it was time to put the kids to bed, thank goodness!!!...long effin weekend i tell ya...now i gotta do my damn brown bear journal, i'm proud of myself this time i did my journal entry every night, w/ alex i forgot about it and had to do it all sunday night...omg tho'...this year brown bear came home w/ a note attatched...please wash me before i go back to school......great something else to do, i didn't have to w/ alex, jeepers creepers i'm holding out for a brown bear free kindergarten class when its timmys turn for school......so now i'll go toss brown bear in da damn dryer and do my final journal entry and with any luck..change outta my glittery painted shirt have some hot chocolate and put up a no vacancy sign in da love shack...

anyone wanting snow?...i can spare a foot or two..just lemme know...god i hate this shit...and to think this is only the first storm.......grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr....now i gotta watch my every move, i will not bust muh ass this year!!!!!...lol...ya believe me?...me either,lol...well lets hope not at least,lol...

coopy

coopy chronicle...yes, AGAIN...lol

woooooooooo, ok free hour...and i'm feelin froggy... time to get creative...

ok omg i told ya i'd leave shit out from thanksgiving,lol...opal reminded me bout my moms response to my darling lil sister lisa callin her a slut...(ok new peeps, lisa is preggers by mango (da fruit) and got dat way after 4 months...oh and she's 18,lol..)...anywho...mom responded w/ a..."do not go there you have no room to talk"...ok again mom couldn't be a slut iffin she tried but was fricken funny to hear her give it back to the witch,lol...

holy and omg this was soooo funny...so i'm makin the stuffing at our house before we head out to pee b4 church & international bank of dads house...i get it all in da pan and put it in da oven..i forgot to cover it and guess what...outta foil......ok lil inside info, we call our neighbors every year w/out fail for foil, we always forget, lmao, it's tradition,lol...so i say hey...call dominick for a piece of foil...gary decides no he'll find something, cussin me out under his breath for forgettin the damn foil again...lol...no foil...he decides (being the brilliant genius i married..) to put a piece of wax paper over it...YES I SAID WAX PAPER...thank god he is good in bed......ok so yes he closes da door, and voila...smoke...he opens da door, grabs it..it catches fire...i'm freakin...lol....he's freakin blowin on it...i'm sayin..."hey einstein ya don't fan da freakin flame...put it in da sink..." he did then proceeds to say..."well ok then, i'll call dominick for that foil now..." ....

friday i vowed not to go out into all that shoppin crap...but, then i remembered this friday night is da company christmas party...please pray for me this year..i really think i will drop dead on da floor if they decide to give him another 197something parts truck as a bonus......still no eyesores in da driveway, woohooo...still early yet tho,lol...anywho...no time to go out and get chris a present so we had to.....i gotta say it wasn't that bad...parking lot was worse than inside of wal-mart...we walked out w/a bunch of deals too and we got chris his first student guitar...should be interesting but hey i'm all about givin him an opportunity...ah yes and when we got out to da van and unloaded the shoppin cart we had also walked out w/ eyeshadow, lmao...uhhuh w/out payin..total opps,lol...we did dat before once bout 6 years ago when alex was a baby, lil teal octopus just walked outta there w/out being scanned,lol...ah well whatdya gonna do?......omg and then we went grocery shoppin..we get to da checkout and there was a girl baggin who was just yappin away w/ a cpl of the male co-workers..outta no where she says.."i wanna be a nun"...then "do ya gotta be religious to be a nun?.."...in my most sweetest w/ no hints of sarcasm at all coopy voice ..i reply "it helps.."...LOL....freakin ditz...

saturday i decorated for christmas while gary pissed me off in da garage w/ his friends all day buildin their new "project", a freakin mini bike......i'm against it...i hate it and i was pissed,lol...they all finally came in that night and i was sittin on da couch wearin a huge bitch look...the guys were like laffin at me sayin..."look at da grouch on da couch..."..BASTARDS,lol...i told em to bite me and when they left i had a few things to say to da movie star,lol......he put muh tree up tho,lol...

sunday mornin, takin full advantage of my madness from da previous night , we went out for breakfast...was just he and i w/ bonnie and clyde (motherlesbianinlaw had decided last minute to take alex& chris overnight...woohoo if i had been puttin out,lol...) after breakfast we hit a few stores...coopy found herself at da jewelery store ...i said hmm bout time for new earrings...he said well ya see anything?...i said well two have caught my eye...i get the lady to take em out...1/4 carat diamond hoops and 1/2 carat diamond hoops...i'm like well the 1/4 are nice but i really like da 1/2...he's like get whatever ya want...$$$$$....but alas i went w/ da 1/4 carats cuz i thought the 1/2s were too flashy for everyday wear...lemme tell ya i was kickin myself in da ass all day for not gettin the others.......BUT!!!...muh birfday is next month so i told him now he knows what i want......i'm just yer typical schemin woman, lmao...

ok from here on out my life gets crazy and calms down again after valentines day...its back to back birthdays...christmas and anniversary......i know yer thinkin..woohoo that just means more stories....yes, yes it does,lol...tomorrow is chris' birthday i slaved over his class' cupcake cones today...i'll bring em in tomorrow before learnin centers, actually i gotta go early as to not blow the cover on his surprise...lol...see they do a thing called mystery reader in his class...the 2 kindergarten classes convene and a mystery guest is brought in w/ the aid of a teacher (w/ a box over their head that goes about waist length..)...the kids get like 3 minutes to ask the guest questions like..."are you um ichabods mom?..)...the box will shake yes or no til they get it right or give up...then the person takes da box off...surprise, kids are happy, and the person reads a story to the classes...goofy yet cute,lol...well...motherlesbianinlaw is the mystery reader tomorrow..chris will freak,lol...she went out and bought new clothes and shoes so he couldn't cheat,lol...then tomorrow night she'll take him to the teddy bear factory and he'll get his bear...

da movie stars birthday is thursday, not much goin on there...he got a surround sound system from us for his birthday...hahaha yes its out of the box and all up...freakin thing i hate it,lol...too loud, grrr i need to hear chat dammit,lol...and me and the terror twins will make him a cake thursday...i got a candle that says over da hill in da shape of a headstone and its musical, it plays da funeral march, LOL...

friday night again...da damn christmas party...imma freeze muh lil white arse off i tell ya, wearin a long black tank dress...gotta show up the girlfriend ...

saturday is chris' family party...this one doesn't worry me, just family...will be laughs i'm sure...

but sunday ...ok i've had 7 kids rsvp...including adrianna ...and the final rsvp date is friday...i'm skeered...i was tellin opal i made gary nail da tree to the floor,lmao...OMG...ok since we couldn't go out to da craft store friday night, motherlesbianinlaw offered to go for us and get the crafts for his spawn gathering...we were grateful, we gave her our ideas...she comes here sunday w/ a HUGE bag full of wooden christmas shapes, magnetic strip, paints, glue, scissors, stick-ons, paintbrushes...and (sit-down please...) GLITTER...WTF?????...grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr i coulda choked her i swear...she spent 49 dollars on all that shit and says ok i'm not buyin the cake you're on your own for that, i spent too much on this... WTF!!!...that was sooo not our freakin idea...i hope gary is ready cuz i'm thinkin i feel a debilitating migraine coming on sunday...and omg to make it worse...i asked lisa and da fruit to help...she called today backin out..i dunno her nipples are leakin er' sumfin stupid......anywho...seamus' mom called to rsvp...she asked if parents could stay or if i wanted them just to be dropped off......i said well you're welcome to stay but it's gonna be chaotic..lol...she said she'd be more than happy to stay and give us a hand...god bless her,lol...whoever she is,lol...hey maybe she'll be hot...lol...da coach's daughter is coming and he's effin hot maybe he'll come and stay.....anywho..anyone willing to contribute to the COOPY PADDED CELL FUND...see opal,lol....it'll be sumfin i'm sure...pray for me...please?...lol

okies this is soooooooooooooooooo long...iffin this were yahoo inches i'd be john holmes...woohoo me...lol...yes im an ass...but at least i'm not a jizz guzzlin butt munch..i still laff at dat bro...and yes...keep on muh arse to delete him next thursday...i will...i promise...scouts honor and all dat shit...kk goofballs...lol, muahsss and gropesssssss and see ya'll soon...

coopy