ok ok..i kno...imma slacka...
jus be happy opal said sumfin bout lisa takin a poop,lol..dats how i remembered, lmao...i woulda fergot...damn i need some ginko biloba er' sumfin...now i gotta put off sex fer a bit..iffen this is short, you'll kno i gave in,lmao...
ok well lets see, ok last thursday i decided i'd take da kiddoes out fer lunch, they wanted spiderman 2 toys n da furkin closest burger king is like across da river like 25 minutes from me so i go off on muh lil trek wiff da kids in da van..n halfway there i got a brainstorm to request a song durin da lunchtime rush thingie on muh fave. station..hadda great email in muh mind too..so as soon as i'd get home i'd email em..i get to burger king, i'm boxed in da furkin drive thru, i order..now i'm used to me n da 2 lil ones, now i have da 2 older ones..all said n done wiff da lady says...ok $19.75 er sum chit..so i drive up a lil n realize i only have 16 bucks ...i'm boxed in n 25 minutes from home..ok furk me i'll jus take mine off at da window..i get up there n tell da dude, he wuz clueless...so this lil big lady comes ova n i tell her i only have 16 to jus take off mine..she does n it came to like $14...i give her $15..(followin me?..lol)...then she says ok i'll jus give ya da soda..i wuz like k, ty..she's like oh hell wiff it n gave me da whole thing..i was really impressed..i thanked her n wuz off...get home n write muh email while spiderman balls (4 of em) are being flung around muh livin room ...this was muh email..
heya,
It's been one week exactly since school let out and already i am pullin muh damn hair out..could u please play Trace Adkins..And They Do..i could really use some perspective..thx..
Darlene C.
so here i am listenin to da radio..eatin lunch n talkin in a box..(n u thought i couldn't multi-task..i can't, lmao..add anotha box n i'm furked..LOL)..the song comes on,lol..but no mention of name or email...damn...so i'm talkin in da box..then da songs ends...da dj comes on n iz laffin..he says da name of da song then.."omg i gotta read dis email"....i freakin in da box..poor box person got so many omg's i think he thought i wuz havin a heart attack,lmao..either dat er' i saw a bee in muh house, lmao..so da dj reads muh email on da air, n ends wiff muh name n "Darlene call me right back n i'll set cha up wiff a pair of countryfest tix, leave the kids at home"...OMG ...i called right back n omg i wuz soo excited..he was still laffin n gave me da hours to come pick up da tix..i called everyone tellin em i won..da movie star thought from da sound of muh voice dat one of da kids broke their arms...oops,lol...i wuz jus sooo happy...he didn't seem thrilled tho so i wuz like..furk!!...i called lisa...she neva been to countryfest so she wuz all ova dat ticket,lol...movie star wuz glad i found someone who would go..n i'm glad i did too cuz dat furker said iffen he had to go i'd be drivin...FURK DAT..it's muh day out, he isn't gonna furk it fer me,lmao..he wuz also glad it wuz free...his moto iz..."if it's free, it's fer me"......lata dat night..alex n chris left fer their sleepova at muh aunts house..only 2 kids..half of heaven,lol...but still no sex as of then, n i wuz turnin into a damn horndog...
friday, since i only had the 2 lil ones i decided i'd go pick up da tix from da station, n being dat fer me to go somewhere alone iz jus unspeakable i called lisa up n invited her..sure np she hadda get da kiwi ready then she'd be ova...she came ova n we took off fer da mall where da station iz located...found da station afta timmy christened da employees only ladies room..."mom i'm startin pee.."..words i cringe at....lol, i offered on da side of da van in da parkin lot but i think da kid has morals,lmao...so i get da tix from da secretary n dat wuz it..well..LOL...on da way out there's a poster fer countryfest, pics of all da artists performing.....i kissed da picture of keith urban on da way out...theres big ole lipstick lips on him,lol.....lisa wuz embarrassed..she yells.."Omg Darlene!!!"...me?..."Wut???"..LOL...furk i didn't care,lol...so anywhoooo...lol...back at da ranch lisa asks me iffen i can babysit dat night afta groceries while her n da fruit go see a movie..yup sure can,lol..then she left fer awhile..muh older brats came home n it wuz chaos once again...motherlesbianinlaw came n we headed to da store...got home jus as they were pullin in...they basically dropped him off n left...he is a serious mr. fussypants...wowzas he wuz hard to please,lol...but afta da house kinda calmed down a lil he settled in n stared at muh lined wallpaper, lmao...movie star n i were watchin a scary movie called Detour...really gay but hey, it's blood n guts, dats fer me...lol..at least muh nephew knos from da start his aunts a freak,lol...lisa n da fruit came n got him n left..
saturday i don't think we did a damned thing cept sit around n watch movies n play video games...lol...alex went to a party at his friends, ahh we did go to target so chris could blo his graduation money on anotha playstation game,lol...wuz bout it tho...purty quiet...hubby fell asleep on me afta insinuatin breakin muh lack of sex streak..furkin tease..so i woke his ass up n took him to bed..wuz jus once but hey..i wuz pleased,lol...had been too damn long...
sunday mornin wuz jus breakfast n baths...then we headed to church..(yes ALL of us )....fer muh cousin todds kids christening...man did i have anxiety ova timmy being in a church ...we're sittin there n i said to da movie star.."can we ask to have him baptized again, i think it wore off n da devil got to him.."...LMAO...afta da ceremony..timmy exclaims.."OK S'OVER"...lmao...it wuz loud...then we went to muh cousins chicks parents house..neva met any of these peeps in muh life, lmao...our side of da fam kinda jus sat together..fruit played wiff da kids runnin around n sword fightin em n stuff...i wuz eyeballin this long blond haired...(I KNO I KNO I DON"T DO BLONDS BUT DAYUMMM)...he wuz tan, no shirt on n DAYUMM...LOL..then chris decides he wants to see da dog inside, they had 2...so i go in n i'm talkin to lisa in da livin room...all of a sudden cakie's runnin wiff a look of OMG....n chris is SCREAMIN like a girl from this lil furkin hairy mop dog,lmao...chris iz cryin hysterically behind me, n wakin both da babies up, so i had words wiff him then sent him back outside,lol...it wuz like 90 out n so furkin hot..n at first their wuz like 7 kids there, next thing i knew they had multiplied bout 3 times so afta dinner we took off...got home in time fer a nap, yup me too,lol..then it wuz off to see fireworks..we go see da albany fireworks every year..motherlesbianinlaw goes to NYC but furk if we eva get dat invite,lol..i'm not bitter ...we have this lil parkin lot spot dats perfect so we went there...it wuz yer typical fireworks display..sorry peeps but it takes a lil more than colored lights in da sky to get muh juices flowin, lmao...we lost timmys attention, oh bout..10 minutes b4 da display, lol..cakie could care less, the non caucasian people next to our van were more interesting to her n i think da older boys were jus prayin it'd be ova so they could huddle up to da gameboys again,lol...
monday, yet again anotha boring day, i say this cuz hubby had da damn day off n any day he's here i gotta act interested in him being here, lmao....i did some of da domestic duties..laundry, cooked...clothed da nakie babes afta da swim, stuff like dat...mom n lisa stopped by afta their visit from da country club they had jus booked fer her weddin reception in 2006 ...ok folks..muh wedding n reception wee both held together in a hall fer 15 bucks a head...per head fer lisa n da convicts reception $79 ..WTF..crazy jus crazy..hellifiknow wuts goin thru moms mind, i wuz like , muh face stayed jus like dat fer a good 10 minutes no shit....alls mom could say wuz.."it's my last big hoorah"..WTF WTF WTFURK ...ok don't lemme git started, lmaoo...but WTF ..should i feel cheated?...oh n did i mention they want a "small" wedding...only 140 peeps...WTF ...i'm willin to bet dat'll be dads face too when mom decides to clue him in... WTFurk!!!!...ANYWHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO...lol...last night ended wiff a cpl mudslides n a holy furk sex session starrin da bunny n da lil mini massager vibe, lmao...wooooooooooo i'm still tinglin thinkin bout it,lol...i'm back in business ....ohhh n yes, i came to chat fer a bit too....lol...
today wuz back to normalcy..(AKA..hubby returns to work,lol)...as soon as da movie star came in he asked me iffen i had heard dat lisas transmission gave out on da fruit n dat wuz his new project at work......tis always sumfin..OMG OMG OMG...i didn't tells ya'll but dat lil furkin truck he got a cpl weeks back...well this rocket scientist who i swear thinks iz some kinda macgyver of vehicles well he took da bed off it,built anotha n added 2 (ya ready fer dis?)..FILING CABINETS..to either side of it as drawers fer chit..painted it n its on da lawn..along wiff da jeep.....da blazer is in muh neighbors back yard awaiting full project status b4 heading out there as well......dear lawd i said to da movie star.."between yer cars on muh lawn n timmys cars all ova muh house i can't win fer shit!"...so sad but so true...tis muh life...ahh well...i talked to muh gf eileen today, she said hawaii wuz great, n she'll be at countryfest too..asked me iffen i thought robbie wuz hittin on me at da weddin, lol...i said yup n iffen da hubby hadn't been there he had a great shot,lol...kk i'm gettin dat "look" so imma head on ova to da couch...i wuz sposed ta get started babysittin again this week but wiff her car outta comission he can't do temp work fer a cpl days, n i only have da baby on wed. n thursdays so next week i guess...ah well once again,lol...kk well i'll be back slackin again n sendin ya mail next week..hopefully some juicy countryfest details cuz i plan on gettin into some kinda trouble somehow...maybe sneak onto keiths tour bus?....oh furk me theres a good idea,lol..him n jax from gh..only 2 blonds dat i'd make an exception fer...ok maybe da shirtless guy from da christening party fer a one night stand..hmm ok theres a few blonds i'd do..but DEFINITELY NOT fabio..EWWW!!!...lmao...ok ok, tty in a bit...buh bye now...
coopy
i'm not gonna spellcheck cuz well dats jus not coopy,lol...n DAYUM...i have competition, da matrix iz on....ok i may hafta chat first sex lata,lol..
ok well lets see, ok last thursday i decided i'd take da kiddoes out fer lunch, they wanted spiderman 2 toys n da furkin closest burger king is like across da river like 25 minutes from me so i go off on muh lil trek wiff da kids in da van..n halfway there i got a brainstorm to request a song durin da lunchtime rush thingie on muh fave. station..hadda great email in muh mind too..so as soon as i'd get home i'd email em..i get to burger king, i'm boxed in da furkin drive thru, i order..now i'm used to me n da 2 lil ones, now i have da 2 older ones..all said n done wiff da lady says...ok $19.75 er sum chit..so i drive up a lil n realize i only have 16 bucks ...i'm boxed in n 25 minutes from home..ok furk me i'll jus take mine off at da window..i get up there n tell da dude, he wuz clueless...so this lil big lady comes ova n i tell her i only have 16 to jus take off mine..she does n it came to like $14...i give her $15..(followin me?..lol)...then she says ok i'll jus give ya da soda..i wuz like k, ty..she's like oh hell wiff it n gave me da whole thing..i was really impressed..i thanked her n wuz off...get home n write muh email while spiderman balls (4 of em) are being flung around muh livin room ...this was muh email..
heya,
It's been one week exactly since school let out and already i am pullin muh damn hair out..could u please play Trace Adkins..And They Do..i could really use some perspective..thx..
Darlene C.
so here i am listenin to da radio..eatin lunch n talkin in a box..(n u thought i couldn't multi-task..i can't, lmao..add anotha box n i'm furked..LOL)..the song comes on,lol..but no mention of name or email...damn...so i'm talkin in da box..then da songs ends...da dj comes on n iz laffin..he says da name of da song then.."omg i gotta read dis email"....i freakin in da box..poor box person got so many omg's i think he thought i wuz havin a heart attack,lmao..either dat er' i saw a bee in muh house, lmao..so da dj reads muh email on da air, n ends wiff muh name n "Darlene call me right back n i'll set cha up wiff a pair of countryfest tix, leave the kids at home"...OMG ...i called right back n omg i wuz soo excited..he was still laffin n gave me da hours to come pick up da tix..i called everyone tellin em i won..da movie star thought from da sound of muh voice dat one of da kids broke their arms...oops,lol...i wuz jus sooo happy...he didn't seem thrilled tho so i wuz like..furk!!...i called lisa...she neva been to countryfest so she wuz all ova dat ticket,lol...movie star wuz glad i found someone who would go..n i'm glad i did too cuz dat furker said iffen he had to go i'd be drivin...FURK DAT..it's muh day out, he isn't gonna furk it fer me,lmao..he wuz also glad it wuz free...his moto iz..."if it's free, it's fer me"......lata dat night..alex n chris left fer their sleepova at muh aunts house..only 2 kids..half of heaven,lol...but still no sex as of then, n i wuz turnin into a damn horndog...
friday, since i only had the 2 lil ones i decided i'd go pick up da tix from da station, n being dat fer me to go somewhere alone iz jus unspeakable i called lisa up n invited her..sure np she hadda get da kiwi ready then she'd be ova...she came ova n we took off fer da mall where da station iz located...found da station afta timmy christened da employees only ladies room..."mom i'm startin pee.."..words i cringe at....lol, i offered on da side of da van in da parkin lot but i think da kid has morals,lmao...so i get da tix from da secretary n dat wuz it..well..LOL...on da way out there's a poster fer countryfest, pics of all da artists performing.....i kissed da picture of keith urban on da way out...theres big ole lipstick lips on him,lol.....lisa wuz embarrassed..she yells.."Omg Darlene!!!"...me?..."Wut???"..LOL...furk i didn't care,lol...so anywhoooo...lol...back at da ranch lisa asks me iffen i can babysit dat night afta groceries while her n da fruit go see a movie..yup sure can,lol..then she left fer awhile..muh older brats came home n it wuz chaos once again...motherlesbianinlaw came n we headed to da store...got home jus as they were pullin in...they basically dropped him off n left...he is a serious mr. fussypants...wowzas he wuz hard to please,lol...but afta da house kinda calmed down a lil he settled in n stared at muh lined wallpaper, lmao...movie star n i were watchin a scary movie called Detour...really gay but hey, it's blood n guts, dats fer me...lol..at least muh nephew knos from da start his aunts a freak,lol...lisa n da fruit came n got him n left..
saturday i don't think we did a damned thing cept sit around n watch movies n play video games...lol...alex went to a party at his friends, ahh we did go to target so chris could blo his graduation money on anotha playstation game,lol...wuz bout it tho...purty quiet...hubby fell asleep on me afta insinuatin breakin muh lack of sex streak..furkin tease..so i woke his ass up n took him to bed..wuz jus once but hey..i wuz pleased,lol...had been too damn long...
sunday mornin wuz jus breakfast n baths...then we headed to church..(yes ALL of us )....fer muh cousin todds kids christening...man did i have anxiety ova timmy being in a church ...we're sittin there n i said to da movie star.."can we ask to have him baptized again, i think it wore off n da devil got to him.."...LMAO...afta da ceremony..timmy exclaims.."OK S'OVER"...lmao...it wuz loud...then we went to muh cousins chicks parents house..neva met any of these peeps in muh life, lmao...our side of da fam kinda jus sat together..fruit played wiff da kids runnin around n sword fightin em n stuff...i wuz eyeballin this long blond haired...(I KNO I KNO I DON"T DO BLONDS BUT DAYUMMM)...he wuz tan, no shirt on n DAYUMM...LOL..then chris decides he wants to see da dog inside, they had 2...so i go in n i'm talkin to lisa in da livin room...all of a sudden cakie's runnin wiff a look of OMG....n chris is SCREAMIN like a girl from this lil furkin hairy mop dog,lmao...chris iz cryin hysterically behind me, n wakin both da babies up, so i had words wiff him then sent him back outside,lol...it wuz like 90 out n so furkin hot..n at first their wuz like 7 kids there, next thing i knew they had multiplied bout 3 times so afta dinner we took off...got home in time fer a nap, yup me too,lol..then it wuz off to see fireworks..we go see da albany fireworks every year..motherlesbianinlaw goes to NYC but furk if we eva get dat invite,lol..i'm not bitter ...we have this lil parkin lot spot dats perfect so we went there...it wuz yer typical fireworks display..sorry peeps but it takes a lil more than colored lights in da sky to get muh juices flowin, lmao...we lost timmys attention, oh bout..10 minutes b4 da display, lol..cakie could care less, the non caucasian people next to our van were more interesting to her n i think da older boys were jus prayin it'd be ova so they could huddle up to da gameboys again,lol...
monday, yet again anotha boring day, i say this cuz hubby had da damn day off n any day he's here i gotta act interested in him being here, lmao....i did some of da domestic duties..laundry, cooked...clothed da nakie babes afta da swim, stuff like dat...mom n lisa stopped by afta their visit from da country club they had jus booked fer her weddin reception in 2006 ...ok folks..muh wedding n reception wee both held together in a hall fer 15 bucks a head...per head fer lisa n da convicts reception $79 ..WTF..crazy jus crazy..hellifiknow wuts goin thru moms mind, i wuz like , muh face stayed jus like dat fer a good 10 minutes no shit....alls mom could say wuz.."it's my last big hoorah"..WTF WTF WTFURK ...ok don't lemme git started, lmaoo...but WTF ..should i feel cheated?...oh n did i mention they want a "small" wedding...only 140 peeps...WTF ...i'm willin to bet dat'll be dads face too when mom decides to clue him in... WTFurk!!!!...ANYWHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO...lol...last night ended wiff a cpl mudslides n a holy furk sex session starrin da bunny n da lil mini massager vibe, lmao...wooooooooooo i'm still tinglin thinkin bout it,lol...i'm back in business ....ohhh n yes, i came to chat fer a bit too....lol...
today wuz back to normalcy..(AKA..hubby returns to work,lol)...as soon as da movie star came in he asked me iffen i had heard dat lisas transmission gave out on da fruit n dat wuz his new project at work......tis always sumfin..OMG OMG OMG...i didn't tells ya'll but dat lil furkin truck he got a cpl weeks back...well this rocket scientist who i swear thinks iz some kinda macgyver of vehicles well he took da bed off it,built anotha n added 2 (ya ready fer dis?)..FILING CABINETS..to either side of it as drawers fer chit..painted it n its on da lawn..along wiff da jeep.....da blazer is in muh neighbors back yard awaiting full project status b4 heading out there as well......dear lawd i said to da movie star.."between yer cars on muh lawn n timmys cars all ova muh house i can't win fer shit!"...so sad but so true...tis muh life...ahh well...i talked to muh gf eileen today, she said hawaii wuz great, n she'll be at countryfest too..asked me iffen i thought robbie wuz hittin on me at da weddin, lol...i said yup n iffen da hubby hadn't been there he had a great shot,lol...kk i'm gettin dat "look" so imma head on ova to da couch...i wuz sposed ta get started babysittin again this week but wiff her car outta comission he can't do temp work fer a cpl days, n i only have da baby on wed. n thursdays so next week i guess...ah well once again,lol...kk well i'll be back slackin again n sendin ya mail next week..hopefully some juicy countryfest details cuz i plan on gettin into some kinda trouble somehow...maybe sneak onto keiths tour bus?....oh furk me theres a good idea,lol..him n jax from gh..only 2 blonds dat i'd make an exception fer...ok maybe da shirtless guy from da christening party fer a one night stand..hmm ok theres a few blonds i'd do..but DEFINITELY NOT fabio..EWWW!!!...lmao...ok ok, tty in a bit...buh bye now...
coopy
i'm not gonna spellcheck cuz well dats jus not coopy,lol...n DAYUM...i have competition, da matrix iz on....ok i may hafta chat first sex lata,lol..
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