wooo an early one...i'm too furkin busy lata this week,lol..

holy furk..ok i'm freakin out..this was jus "da weddin" dat i'd mention repeatedly fer bout ohhh a year now, n omg it's in 6 days....freakin is actually an understatement...i can NOT wait til its ova...see iffen it was winter i'd be lookin fer ice to bust muh ass so dat i could get outta it, lmao..no furkin ice..i'm in it, no turnin back...eileen (da bride n muh bestest friend from hs) brought da dress to me thursday...it's gorgeous..tried it on fer da movie star n he was like.."well hmm look at dat yer in a dress..n umm whoa..n umm ya did damn good matchin da hair, lol"...he's a furker i tell ya...oh n i had da shoes on too n had him cut da lil strappy things n add a hole er' two so i can wear em REAL furkin tight..(as to not bust muh ass..i really am seriously freakin bout dat,lmao)...after i got da dress muh checklist went into action...i wasn't gonna wear a slip but ummm came to a realization i can't be wiffout it, lol...n muh hairdresser is leavin thursday fer vacation so i hadda do some callin fer someone to gimme da ole "up-do"..LOL...hubbys like "can'tcha do it yerself?".."puhleaseee...it's an expensive day deal wiff it, lol.."...lil things left i could grab at wally world ova da weekend...

friday...well in da a.m. i made da mistake of callin mom.....we're jus bs'in n we started talkin bout hubby somehow..talkin bout how he lost weight...n outta no where..."well he has no ass".....oh hell no..i jus laughed but its kinda sickenin knowin moms checkin him out......i'd be sure to tell him too don't u worry, lol...lata dat afternoon i laid in da sun, n OMG i was torched all down da front of me...movie star comes home n we're gettin ready fer shoppin, n i'm in this lil blue top n completely red down da front of me...like a line where i was split front n back, lmao..he says.."omg u are THAT person"..."here's an idea..ROLL OVA"...furker, lmao...i explained muhself sayin "shup, i'm doin da otha side tomorrow"...LOL..we were gonna go out fer dinner but jus before we headed out after da motherlesbianinlaw finally showed..lisa called n wanted to stop n get motherlesbianinlaws gift dats been sittin on muh counter fer a week...sure np..i hang up n look at da movie star.."HAHAHA no dinner...yer buddys comin", n i'm laffin....he's like huh?...i tell him..."oh hell no we're goin out"..n he's laffin...we quickly shop, he's bumpin into me every chance he can to irritate da sunburn cuz he's a furker dat way...lol...we go to check out...n they decide to card me fer da alcohol...i didn't have muh license big surprise huh? ..i thought hubby was gonna blow a gasket, they see us every week...i'm like np..n i'm tellin him to shush, lol...told him iffen he was gonna bitch to bitch at me...lol...we leave n he goes to da beverage mart, lol i sat dat one out..he gets back in da truck wiff da booze n like da smartass he is, smirks at me n says..."he asked to see yer license "..LOL.."u furker..hurry up we gotta get home"..."when are they comin?".."now"..LOL..we get home n unload...n phone rings..it's lisa, they're too tired.....i didn't go off on her tho i dissed a dinner fer her n his convict ass...grrrr...she promised she'd be ova on da weekend n i jus said..k...movie star wasn't pleased at all but hey dats life, lol...

saturday...hubby worked in da a.m...n i jus went about muh day...by late mornin i had da troops outside n i was "evenin" da back..LOL...movie star comes home carryin a bag..i thought he was payin da cable bill......he not only paid it but decided we hadda have da digital cable.....great anotha remote to lose n have alex in therapy fer,lol...then he tells me dannys comin up in a bit to help unload our old washin machine from 2 years ago,lol...umm k...i'm tannin here,lol...he went in n cleaned up then immediately got da box n digital cable goin... 5 minute box rule...figures...i come in n ask him.."how am i lookin?"..."a lil red "..he says "not enuff tho"..."k then i'll go back fer another half hour er' so"...i come in a half hour lata...immediately i'm in severe pain..DAT FURKER!!!!!...lmao...i was sooo torched...i started da lotion therapy ASAP...i'm all kindsa slo movin n shit n i couldn't sit..jus lay on muh tummy on da couch, LOL...when i was feelin slightly better wiff da lotion on i went into da kitchen to get dinner in order, he comes in...kids are in da livin room...i ask him to apply more to muh back..he does...as he is cakie walks in n is makin a drawin next to us...i lean ova...he pulls muh shorts down n slaps muh ass......got half da sunburned part, lol....OUCH, lol..but i can't complain,he won't let me, cuz he hates da fact dat i do this in da first place,lol...lol...cakie looks up n laughs hysterically.."dad..u spanked mom"...n that wasn't good nuff'...she goes into da living room n goes to alex sittin there wiff his gameboy.."alex..daddy jus spanked mom"...then to chris watchin t.v..."fris'...dad jus spanked mom..."...then to timmy playin wiff his matchbox cars.."timmy...dad jus spanked mom"...movie star n i are jus dyin, lol...cuz it was so funny hearin her go to each n say that n none of em acknowledged her er' what she had to say, lmao...i was like "i can see it now..."uncle danny..dad jus spanked mom".."...LOL...she had forgotten by the time he showed up, n they got out da washer then we jus bs'd about the nudie channels we now have as i laid in pain on da couch,lol...then hubby decides after dinner.."field trip to home depot n wal-mart"..OUCH..but um "k "...we pack up n head to home depot...we stay in da van, he goes in..furk me have i eva mentioned home depot is great to hang out n watch da hot guys goin in?...furk furk furk, i wasn't feelin pain checkin out all da eye candy,lol...then wal-mart...i managed to get all muh purple accessories dat i felt i needed...n our main purpose was to take timmy so he could spend his lil giftcard so hubby takes timmy n chris n i have cakie n alex...we're walkin thru, i grabbed muh hair color (yes da dark one, i guess i'm keepin it )..n cakie grabs me by da neck n hugs me really tight n says "i'm sorry"...i shoot alex a wtf look,lol..n he laffs..."why ya sorry katie?"..."cuz yer cute"...wut a lil weirdo, lol...alex n i were crackin up n cakie was too...then i hear..."there they are!!..."...i turn around n see chris, n hubby..n timmy..WEARIN A BLACK COWBOY HAT!!..LOL...i'm like..."omg did he want dat?"..."yeah against muh better judgement"...."DATS MUH BOY!!!...he's a true TIM!!"....movie star says.."yeah n mom forcefeedin it has no bearing right?"..."furk u"...LOL...don't listen to him,lol......then on da way home we're listenin to country (of course,lol) n boot scootin boogie comes on..ok now 1 thing ya don't kno bout da movie star iz dat he will furk up n screw wiff da words of EVERY country song, lol..he knows it bugs me,lol...so we're listenin, he's drivin n starts singin..."cataracts..blackjack..colonosopies n chokin on hot dogs".."hey its a song about yer aunts picnics".....he's so right tho, lmao...such a furker, but a damn good laugh..lol...."could ya imagine if she was chokin on chicken?.."...he's dyin n i'm like.."yeah like chokin on a weiner is any better?"...we're dyin n the kids are jus lookin at us like..huh?...lol....


sunday, while da movie star went to get anotha truck 2 sell ..mom stopped by after church to pee.....we were bs'in bout how things are at home..n i asked iffen da fruit had gotten a job yet..she proceeds to tell me he has been out applying to a few places, one being for a security position...A WHAT?...even mom had da gall ta say.."do u really think you'll be hired?"..LMAO..i mean WTF...oohh movie star got quite a tickle outta dat one..then she left to go home n do laundry er' some shit..she really wanted to see the dress..."ya really hit the mark on yer hair color"..woohoo i'm thinkin it's gonna look good,lol...all of a sudden muh next door neighbor comes ova n walks in wiff da movie star n they're carryin power tools....the air conditioner sittin on da backporch in da box had been festerin fer weeks...finally got da best of him, it was goin in... but in muh wall here by da pc?...it was quickly brought to hubbys attention dat was a bad plan, n new plans were made, god bless muh neighbor!!!, LOL...no snowsuits in june...chris' lil oompa loompa lookin buddy devin came over to swim wiff his mom..after bout an hour of complainin they got to go in..i sat COVERED, lol...not in as much pain on da glider n was towel wench...afta they left...it was back to air conditioner work..alex, timmy n cakie stayed out in da backyard fer a lil bit...i look out, as hubby was standin right there.." what the hell ya diggin a hole there for???"...alex says..."we're diggin to china"..."oh hell no u aren't"...movie star looks up from his project n yells at em to stop,lol...then phone rings..."darlene?"..."yeah?"..."mom called t'js parents n said you want us to stop by when we pick the baby up?"..."she said wut?..."...LOL..."moms delusional...but we'll be here iffen ya want"..."ok"...LOL...muh moms bad, lol...she jus wants to se wut muh motherlesbianinlaw got da baby, i'm not dumb, LOL..i cleaned up, n after da movie star played around wiff da freezer/ i mean air conditioner..(i'll be stayin outta dat room i tell ya, LOL)...lisas truck pulls up...kids are all screamin.."mango"......well lemme tell ya....lol...looks like da klink isa purty good diet plan, lmao!!!..he lost weight..n lisa made him shave..i had to admit, he didn't look dat bad,lol..still da same ole goofy attitude but kinda mellow too,lol...he held da baby mostly, i didn't grab him, figure i'll jus wait...lol..lisa n i chatted a lil bout muh aunts anniversary party...25 years ago lil coopy wuz da flowergirl..it's da same day as da wedding n i hated not bein able ta go..sooooo it's a secret but we're going to dat too....LOL..don't ask, i'm not sure how being in 2 places at once will work fer me,lol..mango says he hears..dat da whole police force will be there.....i'll remain calm,lol...lisa n mango kno we're goin, i said to her.."jeff gonna be there?....(jeffs da ex dat i left fer da movie star...n really good friend of muh uncle)..."they wouldn't invite him, it's too awkward".."umm lisa?...I'M not supposed ta be there"..LOL..."oops" she says,lol..stay tuned..it'll be interesting...we still are keepin it secret that we'll be there...then they left...wiffout da present ..yes WIFFOUT it ...n like grand central station dat muh house iz on da weekend...in walks hubbys friend rich...givin da hubby money fer seatbelts fer da batmobile...they put em in da car then hubby came in n we put da kids ta bed then he n rich put up blinds in da "meat locker"...LOL...muh new term fer da back porch...afta rich left..i needed anotha coat of lotion...well got dat n a lil more.....actually got da lotion while ...ok ok u get da point,lol...sunburn won't stop me, lol no pain no gain,lol..i'm all normal again feelin too...n bronzed quite nicely..i'll go back out by wednesday fer final sessions..

i've volunteered to go back into spawn class fer da next 2 tuesdays, why?..cuz imma asshole,lol...jus fer sumfin else to do i spose'..lol...the week picks up friday wiff da rehearsal n rehearsal dinner..(i'll get to check out da guy i'm paired wiff )...only prollem is i have no effin clue where da furk i'm goin, lol..a mapquest map n away i go i spose,lol...i'll leave da movie star a shoppin list n i think dannys watchin da brats while he goes...then i gotta come home n wash muh hair cuz i wuz told i can't wash it saturday mornin ...saturday mornin i have da pedicure, then da hair appt...then home to change n be at her moms by 12:30..weddings at 2:30..reception at 4 (bein dat i don't literally "break a leg")...at bout 7-7:30 we'll exit to go to muh aunt n uncles anniversary party..full freakin get up i'll be in, lmao...then we can make it home fer bout 10-11 ish...i prolly won't be online tho...i don't intend on drinkin much iffen anything but i'll be tired n i'll hafta make a pasta salad...lol..."WHY? at 11 p.m ya ask?"...cuz we have a furkin picnic at da same aunt n uncles on sunday n she volunteered me to do it...i spose i could do it sunday mornin couldn't i?..geez glad i thought of dat,lol..i still prolly won't get online tho, so da coopy will be a purty scarce commodity from fri-sunday night...next weeks coopy mail will prolly break da records i'm thinkin...lol...then next week is chris graduation so i'll wait to send it til wed. nite possibly..gawd summer vacation..i'm cringing now,lol..no really..i am, lol...man i'm tired jus thinkin bout this weekend, lol..wish me luck, n jus don't tell me ta "break a leg"..cuz bein me, i prolly will, lmao i'm such a clumsy shit, lol...ok off to get fric n frac from da bus..see ya's in 2 n stuff...muahhhss n ass gropes...some boob gropes...ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh n fer whoever is sayin i'm not goin in october, ummm I neva said i wuzn't,lol...

coopy